#25

Ctikey, 5 months since my last post, the time has flown by. I've been doing relatively well, i still use porn but it isn't to the extent previously. But over the past week i've found myself visiting a couple of old haunts and then that little voice in my head became louder to the point that this weekend i went back to my old habits. Kicking myself again. Mentally i was quite strong or so i thought, even to the point when i could actually feel i was above it all and didn't need those images or thoughts. But of course one little diversion to an old haunt and that was it, a hint was all i needed and then the floodgates opened. The folks have been away this weekend so i've had the place to myself and the computer. They've been away so much over this year that i've had lots of time to myself and the PC it hasn't been a real hassle, i've been able to get up and walk away from the computer. But i suppose a downturn was expected, peaks and troughs and all that. Back in a trough.

I need to pick myself up again, the changes i need to make to my lifestyle have come back into view. I've been getting sloppy, i need to re-focus and move on, i am better than this i am above all of this. It's a fucking cesspool and i need to get away from it all. Fuck the sites and their image hosting sites, fuck it all. I'm a 31 year old male still living at home, with a dead end job and still single, i need to change.